Rejecting a suitor due to some characteristics that repulse the prospective wife

9-3-2011 | IslamWeb

Question:

Is it permissible for me to reject a suitor because I do not like the way he talks, his harsh voice as well as his limited knowledge?

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Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allaah, the Lord of the worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.

 

Religiousness is the basis according to which each one should choose his spouse. In some Hadeeths (narrations), the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said:

·        “If there comes to you [a man] whose religiousness and morals you approve, then let him marry [from the women under your guardianship]; otherwise, there will be Fitnah (temptation/ trial) on earth and widespread corruption.” [At-Tirmithi and Ibn Maajah]

·        “A woman is chosen as a wife for four reasons: her wealth, lineage, beauty and religiousness. You should choose the religious one; otherwise, your hands would be dusted (you would be a loser)” [Muslim]

However, if the religious suitor has some characteristics which are disliked by the one to whom he is proposing, it is permissible for her to find another religious partner who is free from disliked characteristics. 

Allaah Knows best.