Thinks that Allaah did not answer his supplication for a pious woman
3-6-2009 | IslamWeb
Question:
Dear Sir,
Asalamualikum. I am writing you from Bangladesh. I am a lawyer in profesion.
I am in big problem regarding conjugal life. I got married on the 14th January 2009. Before getting married I had Istekhara done by two persons. Results were positive in both istekhara according to the persons who had it done. I did not do any istekhara by myself. But I always prayed to get a wife as a gift from Allah with the qualities which I desired and with the qualities which Allah deems proper and fit for me. Unfortunately I did not get which I prayed. In addition to this, recently I have heard a very negative message about my wife which she and her family have completely hidden to me before getting married. After hearing this message I am confused that as a human being whether I will be able to continue a normal and happy conjugal life or not. As a very simple person how can I continue my normal conjugal life tolerating such a negative message?
I don’t know how the persons did the istekhara for me. It is not possible for me to stay with them during the istekhara. So I had to believe them. After all both of them are Imam of mosques. But I myself prayed to Allah. There is no doubt.
In this circumstances I am very confused about what I should do. If she is indeed a gift of Allah, then how she is a gift of Allah? Because I did not get what I prayed. After all her character before marriage was in question. So would you please answer the following questions?
1. Since I did not get what I prayed, so can I still deem my wife as a gift of Allah? 2. Can I reach in this decision that my prayer has not been accepted by Allah in the way what I prayed? If it is so, then she is not a gift of Allah; isn’t it?
3. If she is not a gift of Allah, can I divorce my wife for the reason of that negative message? Though I had istekhara done and prayed by myself for a gift. If it is so, what will happen for istekhara and my prayer?
Please clarify the matter and let me know.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, you are not permitted to accuse this woman of having done some bad matters before marriage just based on the news that you heard about her, because in principle a Muslim is innocent until he is proven guilty. Furthermore, you should not divorce her just because of this news which is only an accusation.
Even if we presume that this woman committed some sins, it might be that she had repented from them, and whoever repents, Allaah accepts his repentance. Therefore, what should be taken into account now is her current situation. Moreover, how can you authoritatively assert that there is no good in your marriage to this woman, or that Allaah did not answer your supplication for a pious woman?
A pious woman does not necessarily mean that she is infallible from committing sins; therefore, we advise you to ignore these whispers and be keen on teaching your wife and disciplining her according to religion and good moral conduct. For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 85121 and 85044.
Besides, it should be mentioned that you should have performed the Istikhaarah prayer yourself about this marriage, as appointing someone to perform the Istikhaarah prayer on behalf of someone else is not permissible according to the preponderant opinion of the scholars 
because the Istikhaarah prayer is an act of worship and in principle no one can do an act of worship on behalf of someone else; for more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 86510.
Finally, it should be mentioned that it is good that you are concerned about supplicating, and we ask Allaah to make your wife a comfort to your eyes and bless you from her with a righteous progeny.
Allaah Knows best.