Her husband's family and first wife are pressuring him to divorce her
17-1-2010 | IslamWeb
Question:
im 7 months pregnant now and i havent seen or heard from my husband for abt 2 months now i dont knw wht to do anymore. his family never knew tht he married me and when they found out they wanted him to leave me for his other wife and kid tht he has to choose one. they came to my house and told me to take money or give them my baby or take child support and take divorce i clearly said no and he did to he said he cant. he went to his other family and tried to calm them down and tell them to accept me meanwhile he was there i got sick and went to the hospital i called him many time he didnt answer he called me next morning n told me tht hes coming and disappeared. i came home and then he wasnt there i called and texted him and his family many times no one replied and then i got scared n called the police they saw my condition and took me to the hospital again and tried calling my husband with no luck later on his wife called me saying he ran away from here and tht they dont knw where he is at all. after i got discharged i took a cab home and since i had no family there and thy didnt want to help me they told me to go back to my moms home and i did. now shes texting me saying hes back and wants to give me a divorce n making up all these lies tht i tricked him into getting married to me which isnt true he came to me by himself and with his happiness knwing he had them in his life already and he wasnt happy with her and only was with her caz of his son. and told me many times tht he wouldnt leave me because he loves me i never asked him to leave them i told him to make everything ok so we can live together and he can have both kids and doesnt have to live secretively to be happy. shes saying the he lied to me abt her when he told her to her face in front of me tht they hve problems and she denied it. now shes telling me tht hes back to her and want to give me a divorce and hasnt even talked to me since tht call when i was at the hospital. please tell me wht to do now
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, it is not permissible for the family of the husband to interfere between him and his wife in order to spoil their marital relationship. Indeed, Allaah advised us to reconcile between them when dissension occurs; Allaah Says (what means): {If you fear a breach between them twain (the man and his wife), appoint (two) arbitrators, one from his family and the other from hers; If they both desire reconciliation, Allaah will cause it between them. Indeed Allaah is Ever All-Knower. Well-Acquainted with all things.}[Quran 4:35] Therefore, interfering between the husband and his wife in order to spoil the relationship between them is contrary to the Sharee’ah. Furthermore, the parents of the husband are not permitted to order him to divorce his wife and he is not obliged to obey them in this regard if they have no sound reason for this, like if the wife whom they ask him to divorce is corrupt in her religion and moral conduct, and it was not possible to rectify her.
Indeed, they were wrong in giving you the choice between giving them the child after birth and divorce (while taking child support), and you did well by not agreeing to anything of that. Divorce is in the hands of the husband and not in the hands of his parents.
If your husband has no sound excuse for not being concerned about you and not contacting you when you were at the hospital, then he is also wrong. Therefore, we advise you to endeavour to look for him and meet him, or contact him in order to have a mutual understanding with him. Indeed, he has the choice between two things which Allaah mentioned in His Book. Allaah Says (what means): {Either you retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness.}[Quran 2:229]
Then, if you are unable to find him, or that you found him but you were unable to solve the problem with him, then you should take the matter to the authority that looks into the affairs of the Muslims in your country so that they would study the case and remove the harm off you.
As regards his first wife, it is not strange that she behaves in this way towards you (as a second wife of her husband). However, she is undoubtedly not permitted to harm you with such provocations or to threaten you that your husband will divorce you.
Hence, we advise you to be patient with her, and if you can change your phone number then do so, so that she will not be able to contact you.
Finally, your husband is obliged to be just between you and her in providing for both of you and in spending the night with you equally. it is an obligation on the husband to be just between his two wives as long as one of them does not renounce her right as explained in Fatwa 90663.