He lived with her and now wants her to marry another man
30-5-2010 | IslamWeb
Question:
Is it okay for a Muslim man to break his promise to a woman? By promising in Allah’s name that he accepted her as his wife and giving some gift as mahar they start living together. Almost after 1 year his first wife and children find out about their relationship. They have influenced him to leave the other lady saying that they will never agree the second marriage, either they will suicide or wants divorce if he continues the relation. Actually the second one loves him so much and doesn’t have any other way, she has suffered a lot in her past. Also even though she is a Muslim she was not living according to Islamic ways, but following his ways she became so religious and prayerful. Now he is asking her to marry another as he doesn't want to hurt his first wife and children. In fact he likes the second very much as she fulfils his desires. Please let me know the Islamic Hukum in this regard. Can he leave her like this? Does islam agree that? Also is it correct for him to sit in the position of a chairman for an Islamic organization by cheating or leaving the second lady?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
It is not clear to us from the question whether the marriage took place fulfilling the conditions of a valid marriage contract, the most important of which is the consent (and presence) of the guardian and the presence of two witnesses, or that it was just an agreement between that man and that woman to get married. If it was the first case that took place, then that woman became a wife of that man.
In this case, it is not permissible for his first wife to ask him to divorce his second wife; Abu Hurayrah 
narrated that the Prophet said: “It is not lawful for a woman to ask for the divorce of her sister (i.e. the other wife of her husband) in order to have everything for herself.” [Al-Bukhari]
Therefore, it is not permissible for her (the first wife) to ask for divorce due to his second marriage. Besides, it is foolishness from her to threaten him to commit suicide.
On the other hand, the second wife should try to convince him to keep her and not divorce her, but in case he insists on divorcing her, then she should accept that and submit herself to the Decree of Allaah as this may be good for her and Allaah may bless her instead with another husband who is better than him. Allaah Says (what means): {But if they separate [by divorce], Allaah will enrich each [of them] from His abundance. And ever is Allaah Encompassing and Wise.}[Quran 4:130] She may also seek the help of some trustworthy Muslims in looking for a pious husband for her.
This is of course if a valid marriage contract took place between her and that man. But if the matter was just an agreement between them to get married, then this is a void marriage as it took place without the consent of the guardian and the presence of two witnesses, whereas the consent of the guardian is a condition for the validity of marriage without which marriage is void according to the view of the majority of the scholars. The same applies to the presence of the witnesses, even if some scholars did not condition the presence of the witnesses at the marriage contract, they conditioned it when consummating the marriage or prior to the consummation of the marriage. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 83629.
Finally, we advise that sister to protect her religion and be steadfast on it even if that husband separated from her. Indeed, a Muslim is tested according to the strength of his/her religion. The Prophet said: “When Allaah loves a people, He tries them; whoever is satisfied will get satisfaction, and whoever is discontented will get displeasure.” [At-Tirmithi and Ibn Maajah] The Prophet also said: “How strange is the matter of a believer, there is good in all his affairs, and this is only for the believer. If something good happens to him and he is grateful, then this is good for him, and if a calamity befalls him and he is patient, then this is also good for him.” [Muslim] For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 83577.