All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, we would like to say that your husband's mention of such statements in front of you does not show good treatment of one’s wife at all, as it is an Islamic requirement for the husband to have a good marital relationship with his wife and treat her well. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {And live with them in kindness.}[Quran 4:19] Moreover, harming a Muslim without right is forbidden in Islam; Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {And those who harm believing men and believing women for [something] other than what they have earned [i.e. deserved] have certainly born upon themselves a slander and manifest sin.}[Quran 33:58] Besides, it is confirmed that the Prophet said: "It is enough evil for a person [i.e. a Muslim] to treat his Muslim brother with disdain.” [Muslim]
When this is the case with regard to the general Muslims, then what about the wife, as Allaah The Almighty has placed a strong covenant between her and her husband. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {And how could you take it (back) while you have gone in unto each other, and they have taken from you a firm and strong covenant?}[Quran 4:21]
Furthermore, it is not permissible for the husband to use his wife in his business without her consent and she is not obliged to accept to do the job. This is because the wife is only obliged to respond to her husband in matters related to the marriage.
For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 91208 and 91788.
On the other hand, having children is a common right of both spouses, so one of them is not permitted to prevent it without the consent of the other partner as we clarified in Fatwa 84472.
In addition to this, limiting the number of children is not permissible; for more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 84472.
In any case, we advise you to be patient with your husband and advise him in a wise manner and good admonition with regard to his manners. We also counsel you to establish mutual understanding about the manners that you mentioned in the question, in the light of what we have discussed in this Fatwa.
Allaah Knows best.