Her husband does not give enough time to her and wants to marry another wife
29-9-2012 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalamualaikum,I’m a 34yrs married indian woman.in our 12 yrs married life we have 3kids,10,7and6 yrs old.my husband indian wants to marry a virgin Pakistani girl of age30.b’cos I’m not giving him time,busy in children and home..and in other matters he only said that I fulfill his every need,whether its sexual or social.i take care him a lot..i told him,,you are not only giving me and my kids time..as he is a doctor,working in picu..qatar..he has night duties in every 4,5 days..he went to usa,Germany to transport patient to and from there hospitals..when he comes,sleep,kids get up,when he gets up,kids went to sleep..hardly giving time to us..but I never complaint for this,I know he become tired,b,cos of work.. and..he don,t like that i’m wearing hijab.what to do?..i’love to wear hijab..i tell him to pray on time..he said..dont tell me that..i ask him..why you are doing this to me and my kids..if you are happy with us..he said its jayaz in islam,,Bilal philips did the same.. I told,reason behind every 2nd 3rd marriges of sahaba’s,prophets,scholars are different..or u r not from kings family..who afford two family expenditures..if he can’t do insaf to both..that will not good for him..by teachings of quran and ahadith.. his father is also doesn’t want him to do so..he was telling my son is not like this before.. maybe some evil things done on him..he is very much upset. We does not tell this matter to his mother,as she is ill,and can’t bear this..we lived in joint family.with parents,and husband’s brother and his family.. please reply my question ..can my husband do the second marriage,?and keep relation with the girl..or if some evil things done on him,..so give me some remedy for that..i’m reciting last 2 ayah of surah bakarah..and giving him water to drink..please reply as soon as possible..in the lights of quran and ahadith.. wassalamu alaikum. sister
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam , is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, we would like to thank you for being keen on wearing Hijab and for admonishing your husband to do good and forbidding him from doing evil, especially in regard to performing the prayer. There is no doubt that these are among the best actions by which you get closer to Allaah, so keep on doing this.
You should not seek the pleasure of anyone by giving up your Hijab, be it your husband or anyone else. For more benefit on Hijab, please refer to Fataawa 89815 and 96283. Also, for more benefit on a husband who does not perform the prayer regularly, please refer to Fatwa 88016.
On the other hand, you should know that it is Islamically permissible for a husband to marry more than one wife if he is able to be just between them; Allaah has the absolute wisdom in legislating this. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 81469.
The fact that the first wife is not negligent about the rights of her husband has nothing to do with the issue of the husband taking a second wife. As regards the husband spending on his wives and being just between them, then this is a matter which only the husband knows. But of course, if he is already negligent regarding one wife and her children, then it is more likely that he will be negligent with two wives if he marries another one.
As regards the father objecting to this marriage, then the son is obliged to obey him in this if he has a sound reason for refusing, otherwise there is no obedience to him. There are some conditions in regard to the obedience of children to their parents, and this is discussed in Fatwa 84942.
Concerning your statement “…and keep relations with the girl”; then if you mean a relation within a valid marriage, then yes, but if it is just an affectionate relationship between them without marriage, then this is Islamically forbidden.
As regards him being affected by some magic, then if you predominantly think that he is affected by it, then the treatment for this is Ruqyah. For more benefit on Ruqyah, please refer to Fataawa 82918 and 88660.
Indeed, reciting the Quran on water and giving it to your husband to drink is permissible and it is a kind of Ruqyah.
Finally, it should be noted that each spouse is required to have a marital relationship with the other on reasonable terms, and to fulfill his/her rights towards him/her. Allaah Says (what means): {And due to them [i.e. the wives] is similar to what is expected to them, according to what is reasonable.}[Quran 2:228]
Allaah Knows best.