Clearing the misconception about Abu Bakr's verbal abuse of 'Urwah
2-6-2013 | IslamWeb
Question:
Assalamu alikum some of the christians and shias among muslims say that abu bakr ra abused urwa badly, they defame Islam and Abu Bakr ra. these are the words Abu Bakr said, “Go suck the clitoris of al-Lat!” if someone says this to Muslims regarding Allah (naudhubillah) thn Muslims will kill the person, but no one punished abu bakr ra on his evil deed. (this is what christians and shias say)
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
What a dull objection and what a repulsive reasoning that the one who made this objection has given, as objecting to that statement (of Abu Bakr, may Allaah be pleased with him) with the expression that you mentioned in the question puts Allaah and His creation on the same footing and makes no difference between the One True God and the false gods; so according to him, the one who insults a false god is like the one who insults the True God. But the Muslims say that the one who insults Allaah, The Exalted, is a non-Muslim and he goes out of the fold of Islam, and insulting the god of non-Muslims is an act by which one gets closer to Allaah and it is an act of obedience in principle, but it might be forbidden to do so as a way of blocking the means to evil, as in the saying of Allaah (which means): {And do not insult those they invoke other than Allaah, lest they insult Allaah in enmity without knowledge. Thus We have made pleasing to every community their deeds. Then to their Lord is their return and He will inform them about what they used to do.}[Quran 6:108]
Nevertheless, it might be permissible to do so if there is a preponderant benefit to do it or that this suits the circumstance, and this is what Abu Bakr 
did. Ibn Hajar 
said in Al-Fat-h: “The Arabs used to insult with this expression but with the wording ‘mother’ (i.e. saying: Go suck the clitoris of your mother), so Abu Bakr wanted to exaggerate in insulting ‘Urwah by placing what 'Urwah worshipped in the position of his mother, and he did so because of being angered by the statement that the Muslims would flee (and leave the Prophet alone), so there is a permissibility of uttering offensive words to scorn someone who did something by which he deserves this. Ibn Al-Muneer said: “In the words of Abu Bakr, there is a depreciation of the enemy, and discrediting them, and making an insinuation to what they said that Al-Laat is the daughter of Allaah – Allaah is High above what they associate with Him, i.e. if it were a girl, it will have what all females have.”
Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim said in Zaad Al-Ma'aad: “In the words of Abu Bakr to ‘Urwah “Suck the clitoris of Al-Laat” is evidence that it is permissible to explicitly mention the name of the private parts if there is a benefit which is necessitated by that circumstance.”
Besides, Shaykhul Islam Ibn Taymiyyah said: “Whenever the speaker is treating us unjustly, then we are not obliged to respond to him (i.e. the one who insulted us) in a good manner.”
This is what the scholars who know the virtue and status of Abu Bakr said, but the ignorant and foolish people do not know this; as there are veils over their hearts, and in their ears is deafness, and it is upon them blindness.
Finally, it should be noted in this regard that a Muslim is not permitted to listen to the misconceptions of the non-Muslims especially if he does not have enough knowledge to refute their misconceptions, because he might go astray by listening to them. What is most important to us is that a Muslim's heart should be firm on the truth and that it is not affected by such misconceptions. As regards the enemies upon whom the decree of misguidance has come into effect, then they wander blindly in transgression even though all sorts of evidence and proofs are presented to them; Allaah says (what means): {Indeed, those upon whom the word [i.e. decree] of your Lord has come into effect will not believe. Even if every sign should come to them, until they see the painful punishment.}[Quran 10:96-97]
Allaah Knows best.