Gifts received to establish forbidden relationships
20-2-2015 | IslamWeb
Question:
A boy called me frequently and almost forced me to love him though i rejected it several time. later i accepted it with the concern of my parents. i spoke to him for one week. after that he came to see me with chocolate.. later he told me that he is fighting with his parents asking them to accept me. so i told him not to force them and asked him to forget me. After that he dint call me or text me. Once i called him to ask for the price of the chocolate and pay him for that, he said he doesnt want it. and he dint speak anything about our marriage or whether his parents accepted me or not. Am i sinful of cheating him? iam dying with grief, please give me an answer. what should i do now.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
What really happened is that you accepted to establish an emotional relationship with that man, and you spoke to him, met him and accepted his gift. All this is not permissible as it is forbidden for a woman to have a relationship with a non-Mahram man as we have clarified in Fatwa 81356.
You were right to separate from him. You leaving such a sinful relationship is what one is obligated to do. By leaving it, you should seek to repent sincerely by fulfilling the conditions of repentance, which are outlined in Fatwa 86527.
You did not deceive him, so just forget about him, and you are not obliged to marry him. But in case he proposes to you for marriage in the future, and if he is generally pleasing in his religion and good moral conduct, i.e. he observes the Islamic obligations and refrains from committing major sins, then you may accept him as a husband.
Finally, the gifts that are a means for producing and maintaining such sinful relationships are not lawful for women to possess, and they should not be returned to the giver who intended something forbidden by them. If the gift has not yet been consumed, then you must get rid of it by giving it to the poor and needy, and if you have consumed it, then you should give the value of it in charity.
Allaah Knows best.