All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
This thinking indicates – Allah willing – that you love the Prophet .
However, it is more appropriate and more beneficial for you to be content with what Allah has predestined and chosen for you than to be preoccupied with this thinking because you do not know if you were at that time what you would have done.
You should thank Allah that you are born a Muslim following the religion of the Prophet .
You should strive to do good deeds so that this will be your means to being gathered with him in the Hereafter.
Your love in your heart for him should incite you to act according to his Sunnah, support his Sharee’ah, and follow his guidance, as Allah Says (what means): {And if you obey him, you will be [rightly] guided.} [Quran 24:54] Allah also Says (what means): {… and follow him that you may be guided.} [Quran 7:158]
Allah Knows best.