Rejecting Proposal after Seeing the Girl

24-2-2001 | IslamWeb

Question:

My family is arranging for my marriage. I agreed with the condition that I should see the girl first and then marry if I like her. But one of our elders cited a Hadith that the boy can see the girl only if he has decided to marry her. I agreed with the terms of this Hadith before everyone and in sound mind. When the girl was shown to me, I did not like her and rejected the proposal. Is it obligatory for me to marry because I saw the girl? Does Islam permit seeing a girl before marriage? Does it allow accepting or rejecting a girl or boy?

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Answer:

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

Islam permits a man who intends to marry a woman to see her before marriage. After looking at her, he/she has the choice to accept or refuse the proposal. He is not obliged to marry her after looking at her. Looking at the proposed girl is made lawful so he can make a decision to marry based upon whether she appeals to him or not.

It is desirable, if possible, to look at her without her knowledge to avoid harming her feelings, if he should decide not to marry her.

For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 82018 and 81551.

Allah knows best.