Her husband prefers pornography to her or Islam
28-3-2005 | IslamWeb
Question:
I desperately need an answer for my question and a solution to this problem! I am married now for three years, when I got married I stayed with my husband 4 months, then he immigrated to Canada, then I followed him after a year and a half, and now I'm in Canada for one year, when I first came I clearly noticed that he has changed completely, I had a very cold welcoming in the airport from him the day I arrived, and he is always telling me: what brought you here I regret that I married you and I was happy alone and stuff like that and without any reason but I always thought that he was joking, he is always behind me looking for a reason to fight about, and the strangest thing I've heard from him is that he doesn't want a child at all, what so ever.... I don't know why he is doing all that, I am alone in this country, he is the only one I have after Allaah and Allaah knows how much I love him I spent all this year crying and asking him to be nice to me and ask him for his forgiveness for things I didn't do, But just to satisfy myself and Allaah, last month I found myself a job after his agreement and permission, one day I came back from work so I turned on the computer and a messenger for a yahoo account popped up, I couldn't believe what I saw, I found out that he has an e-mail which I don't know about, and at least 12 women on the list with nude pictures and dirty talks and returned e-mails and addresses for sin houses, I am treating him like a king and that's what I get at the end, despite he doesn't want to pray even the Jumua' and he always watches sex movies and naked women on websites and the channels, I tried to stop him thousand times, nothing is working he even shouts at me and calls me bad words and starts swearing and yelling at me when I change the channels, what kills me is that he says to me: hey, just come and watch what she's doing, look at her beautiful body!! Or don't watch it if you don't like it. I was happy and now you spoilt my night I shouldn't have applied for a visa for you from the start, this is my life I love naked ladies and you have to get used to that. Now shut up........ that's what I get if I try to change the channel. I want to solve this problem by any cost, I was raised in a religious educated and conservative family and all these thing do not exist in our house, please advise me I am so tired I can't tell my parents they will die if they hear that, so I turned to you I can't live with this man any more, he really doesn't know my value or the value of my religion.... I feel like we are from two different planets, please tell me what steps should I take and do I need to let my parents know. I am under so much pressure all those naked girls in the streets all day long and all those destroying programs and advertisements and those nudity movies and he is a way too far from his religion all this is tearing me apart, I desperately seek and advice from you.
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
No doubt if what you said about your husband is true then he is committing great sins and violating the commands of Allaah. He is even disrespecting you and your basic rights. If you have no hope of his repentance and return to the straight path then you have to seek divorce from him.
You have to seek refuge of Allaah and His Help; He is the best of Helpers and does not neglect pious people. Allaah Has assured that He will surely help those who are ill-treated and oppressed.
You have to inform your parents and consult the nearest Islamic center in your area; they will help you in your matter.
May Allaah bless you and grant you a happy life. Know that whoever fears Allaah and puts his trust in Him, He will make all his matters easy. Allaah says (which means): "And whoever fears Allaah-He will make for him a way out. And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allaah-then He is sufficient for him." [Qur'an 65:2-3]
The above rulings are mentioned in a case similar to yours in our previous Fatwa: 83052.
Allaah knows best.