His wife insists on working in a mixed workplace wearing make up
18-12-2005 | IslamWeb
Question:
Actually I married a woman 1 year ago and she was working in mixed environment. I was hopping to be better religion wise and give work with mixed environment day by day. I couldn't tolerate her working with men so I asked her to look for women environment to work with. Because I can't tolerate her to be work with men any more especially she is pretty. I am not satisfied with her dress yet but she is insisting to work with mixed environment. Now we have a baby only 6 months old and my wife is insisting to go back to work with mixed environment and also wants to dress as she want not as I want she wears scarf by the way but I need something more religious. And she is insisting too to put make every now and then but I always refuse to put any make up out of home. I asked her to put make only for me but she is insisting to wear it outside. Now we are in a big trouble. Please help me am I right or wrong and do I have right to ask her stop working with environment I don't like and wear. What I like and don't wear make up out side?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
If your wife is as you mentioned in the question, then she has committed two infractions.
The first infraction: She breached Allaah's Order; it is forbidden for a woman to work in a place where men and women are mixed, on this issue, please refer to Fatwa 83953. Failing to cover herself with Hijab is also forbidden, in this regard, please refer to Fatwa 83702. Similarly, beautifying herself were marriageable men see her is forbidden; please refer to Fatwa 82280. For the conditions for a woman to work, please refer to Fatwa 82399.
The second infraction: Failing to obey her husband. A woman is obliged to obey her husband in what is permissible. The Prophet 
said: "If I were to order someone to prostrate to other than Allaah, I would have ordered the wives to prostrate to their husbands." [At-Tirmithi] Therefore, it is more confirmed on her to obey her husband when ordering her to avoid something which is already forbidden in Islam, and she is more sinful if she refuses to abide by his order. So, as long as she is in this situation, she is a disobedient woman. You should first be patient with her, and then try to rectify her by following the steps that are already determined by the Islamic Law in dealing with a disobedient woman. For more details on this please refer to Fatwa 89480. If she persists on this situation you should consider divorcing her especially that she is not obeying you as her protector and provider, and this could lead to many problems the size of which only Allaah Knows.
There is no doubt that you are right about what you are ordering her to do, like abandoning working in a mixed workplace and abandoning the use of make up when going out where marriageable men could see her.
Finally, it should be noted that when a Muslim is neglectful about the religious requirement in choosing a pious and religious wife who knows Allaah's Rights on her and obeys her husband, he might face many difficulties in his marital life, so one should endeavour in finding peaceful means of settling difficulties and problems.
Allaah Knows best.