His girlfriend with whom he committed fornication refuses to marry him
18-12-2005 | IslamWeb
Question:
I love a lady and after time with each other we make a mistake with each other and we deal to marry after that then a big problem happen and we separate I was very sorry for that and feel every thing black I decided to return to god and be sorry for all my mistakes and I go with my family to marry her but she refuse and I try after that with her very very mush and all that truly to god face I become anther one but she also refuse all my effort then I leave all that issue to god what I do to be pure from that mistake completely?
Answer:
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
Adultery or fornication is considered by Allaah as one of the great major sins, and He warned us against it in His Book, as Allaah Says (which means): {And come not near the unlawful sexual intercourse. Verily it is a fahishah (i.e. anything that transgresses its limits; a great sin) and an evil way (that leads one to Hell) unless Allaah forgives him/her.}[Quran 17:32]. Therefore, whoever has committed this sin is obliged to sincerely repent to Allaah, and not inform anyone about it. He has to conceal his sin as the Prophet 
said: "Whoever amongst you happens to commit any of these dirty sins, he/she should conceal himself/herself as Allaah has concealed his sin." [Al-Haakim and Al-Bayhaqi]
If you have sincerely repented, then Allaah is the Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. Allaah Says (what means): {Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning] do not despair of the mercy of Allaah. Indeed, Allaah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful. And return [in repentance] to your Lord and submit to Him before the punishment comes upon you; then you will not be helped."}[Quran 39:53]. Allaah further Says (what means): {Indeed, Allaah loves those who are constantly repentant and loves those who purify themselves.}[Quran 2:222]. In another verse Allaah Says (what means): {Do they not know that it is Allah who accepts repentance from His servants and receives charities and that it is Allah who is the Accepting of repentance, the Merciful?}[Quran 9:104].
The conditions of repentance are as follows:
1 – To give up the act of disobedience.
2 – To regret having done this disobedience.
3 –To be determined not to commit or return to this disobedience again for the rest of one's life. For more details please refer to Fatwa 87903.
Thus, in order to purify yourself from your sin, you should fulfill the above conditions and conceal your sins, and return to Allaah in repentance and be determined not to return to this abominable sin. It is not one of the conditions of repentance to marry such a woman, rather it is forbidden for a man to marry a woman with whom he committed adultery or fornication unless she sincerely repents to Allaah and does righteous deeds and provided that he himself repents as well. For more details please refer to Fatwa 81160.
Allaah Knows best.