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Fatwa CenterShe and her husband are disputing on the amount of her dowry
Question
Asalamu Alaikum
Does the bride decide on the Mahr, or can the groom set limits on the dowry. I really can’t recall deciding on my mahr value but my husband tells me that I did. I’m just really confused.
The last thing I can remember before the nikkah took place is my husband told me that we’d talk about it tomorrow and that I cannot base my mahr on something too expensive he can’t afford. The nikkah was going to happen the next day after our conversation on the phone that night.
So, when the nikkah took place, the next day when I got to see my husband I told him that I don’t remember deciding a value for my mahr. So I amused that he have chosen I value for me.
Thank
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
There is no harm if either of the spouses decides the value of the dowry, but no amount would be legally binding except the amount they both agreed upon. It should be noted that anonymity of the dowry or not determining it in the marriage contract does not affect its validity.
We understood from the question that the spouses disputed over the value of the dowry and that each claims that the other party has decided a specific amount. Scholars widely differed about the ruling if the spouses disputed over the amount of the dowry. Some scholars held that the approved say is the say of the one who claims the equal dowry that is given to the wife’s likes (i.e. the same dowry as other woman of the same social status like her). Other scholars held that the husband and wife should be both asked to swear that Mahr was so and so amount. If they both swear, then a dowry equal to the one given to her likes is decided. If one declines and the other swears, the latter's say will be considered. Other scholars differentiate whether the dispute occurred before or after consummation of marriage. To sum up, the Sharee‘ah court or the body that acts on its behalf is the one that ends this dispute.
Finally, we alert you that facilitating the dowry is a means for the marriage to be blessed. It was narrated on the authority of ‘Aa’ishah 
that the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, said: "The most blessed woman is the one who has the lowest dowry." [Ahmad] We also alert you that the wife has the right to discharge her husband of the dowry, wholly or partially. So, there is no reason to investigate this matter now after completion of your marriage. For further information, see Fatwa 130643.
Allaah Knows best.
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