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Fatwa CenterShe lied to her husband about her age
Question
By Allah I did a great wrong by not telling my husband my true age that i am a year older than him before we got married 22 years ago. We now have a daughter.My husband is the kindest and most religious husband. He tries very hard to emulate the Sunnah and follow the Quran and i know at this point age would not be a problem in our marriage but the damage i have done i am afraid would have a lot of implications. I have also become very religious and do not want to continue in this situation without knowing the islamic verdict of my actions especially if my MARRIAGE IS VALID OR NOTeven though all the requirements have been fulfilled. I am very fearful that I will hurt him and our families forever if he gets to know about this. I repent to Allah everyday about this and at one point in time I told my husband that i have committed a crime on him and that i lied to him and begged him not to ask me the lie i told but only to forgive me for the sake of Allah and he said he forgave me for whatever crime i committed. I have been the best wife i could be to him except for the fact that this lie stains all my efforts at being extremely good to him. I have asked many people for advice even an Imaam at one time and they told me that if my telling him is going to bring about fitnah or cause more harm than good, I should just let it be and repent for forgiveness. I need to have a clear answer and direction as to what to do. Please help me. Please note that when i told him this lie we were not mrried yet and we went our different ways but met again and he proposed marriage and i was so hooked to him i did not want anything to come between us. Besides I was not so religious beacuase my wester influence. I was far from being pious and i now regret everything i did and even cry and plead to Allah for forgiveness and to reward him with all blessings everytime I am alone.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His Slave and Messenger.
As for the ruling of this marriage, if it has met the conditions of the valid marriage, the most important of which are the Wali (guardian) and two witnesses, then it is a valid marriage. Not telling your husband about your real age and that you are a year older than him has no effect on it. This (i.e. being older than your husband) is not a legitimate defect for the Prophet, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, married Khadeejah 
while she was many years older than him, and you are only one year older than your husband. For more benefit, kindly refer to Fatwa 83629 about the conditions of the valid marriage.
You have done well by seeking to fulfill the rights of your husband in the best way. This is what is expected from the good Muslim woman. Allaah The Almighty Says (what means): {So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband's] absence what Allaah would have them guard.} [Quran 4: 34]
Ibn Katheer 
said regarding the interpretation of that verse: "Devoutly obedient means obedient to their husbands, as Ibn ‘Abbaas 
and others stated. {Guarding in [the husband's] absence} according to As-Suddi and others, means that she protects her honor and her husband's property when he is absent. {What Allaah would have them guard} means: the guarded (person) is the one whom Allaah guards." [ End quote]
Based on this, we advise you to remain firm in your behaviour. As for the sin you mentioned which is lying about your age, if you have repented from it and asked your husband to pardon you generally, then this is sufficient, Allaah Willing. But, do not tell your husband explicitly about this sin again or make a reference to it for he may assume about you various assumptions and think about something worse than that, and thus dissension occurs and the whole family breaks up.
Finally, do not think much about that nor ask other scholars to get different opinions lest this may prevent you from paying attention to what is beneficial for you in your life and religion.
To know the general conditions of repentance, kindly refer to Fatwa 86527.
Allaah Knows best.
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