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Fatwa CenterA sister refusing to serve her siblings who spend on her
Question
Assalaamu alaykum. My sister does not do much at home, and neither does she provide for the family. My other sisters, brother and I work, but she refuses to work because she says that according to Islam she does not have to. This does not take into account the burden of the bread winners in the family. If someone asks her to iron or clean something instead of working, then she also says that she does not have to. In Islam, she is not obligated to do any housework if she does not want to. I disagree with her as my mum is almost sixty years old and she can help her ease her burden, but she does not want to do anything as she says that according to Islam she does not have to. Please advise on whether she is correct according to the sharia. If so, then her doing this for her selfish reasons of not having to do anything causes disharmony within the family. May Allaah reward you.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
If your sister owns money, then she must spend on her own self from her own money, because whoever has money, then his expenditures should be from his own money even if he is young. Ibn Al-Munthir said, “All the scholars from whom we learnt knowledge agreed in a consensus that a man must spend on his children who do not possess any money…”
So, Ibn Al-Munthir mentioned that spending on one's children is obligatory with the condition that they do not possess money.
This applies if your sister does not have a husband, because if she is married, then her husband must spend on her even if she is rich. In this regard, please refer to fatwa 85012.
If your sister is poor and does not have any money and does not have a husband, then are her siblings obliged to spend on her or not? The scholars differed in opinion about this: there is a strong view that they are not obliged to spend on her.
As regards your mother, if she needs to be served, then both her male and female children are obliged to serve her directly or pay someone to serve her. Alkhaadimi, from the Hanafi School of jurisprudence, said in Bareeqah Mahmoodiyyah, while speaking about the rights of the parents, “If they need to be served, then their children are obliged to serve them.”
Also, Ghithaa’ Al-Albaab, authored by As-Saffaareeni, reads, “Among the parents’ rights is that they be served [i.e. their children serve them] if one of them or both of them need service.”
So, your sister has a share in the work in the service of her mother who is in need for service. The same applies if your mother needed expenses and she does not have a husband, then both her male and female children are obliged to spend on her if they are able financially to do so. Ibn Qudaamah said, “Ibn Al-Munthir said, 'Muslim scholars held a consensus that the maintenance of poor parents, who have no income or wealth to spend, is obligatory on their children.'”
However, we have not come in the statements of the scholars across something about a sister serving her siblings. It appears – and Allaah knows best – that she is not obliged to serve them, because in principle this is not obligatory upon her. But her siblings may refrain from spending on her because she does not want to serve them, as a way of treating her in a similar manner.
In any case, it should be noted that cooperation and understanding should prevail among family members as this is one of the reasons for the happiness of the family.
It would be a good idea to have competition among the family members in doing righteous work and seeking the reward from Allaah Almighty especially with regard to serving the mother. The more one gets exhausted in this service, the greater the reward will be. ‘Aa’ishah 
narrated that the Prophet said, “Your reward will be commensurate with your effort.” [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
Allaah knows best.
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