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Fatwa CenterChildren mother's primary obligation, not work or studies
Question
Assalaamu alaykum. I have a question about a situation that our sisters are facing today. There are so many sisters that are choosing to work/study and leave their child in kindergarten, where the disbelievers are raising them. I know about some sisters that were leaving their eight-month-old baby in kindergarten so that they could study, and the people working at the kindergarten are non-Muslims. Is it allowed for them to do this, just leave their children like this? I heard that working/studying should not affect our children, but of course they are affected when their mother let the kindergarten raise them. They say that they are studying so that they could do good with their work and help our Ummah (Islamic community), but how can they get reward and work for our Ummah when they cannot even raise and watch after their own children? Will they really get reward for the study/work when they are doing this to their own children?
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ʻalayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
Firstly, it should be noted that the Islamic sharee'ah does not forbid the woman from working as long as she abides by the relevant sharee'ah teachings and provisions. The Muslim woman is also allowed to study Islamic studies or whatever discipline that suits her feminine nature and she shall be rewarded for that if she intended to benefit her fellow Muslims by her work or study. The good intention behind a lawful deed renders that deed a rewardable act of obedience. The Prophet, sallallaahu ʻalayhi wa sallam, said, “...and in man's sexual intercourse (with his wife) there is an act of charity.” They (the Companions) said, “O Messenger of Allaah, is there a reward for him who satisfies his sexual need among us?” He, sallallaahu ʻalayhi wa sallam, said, “You see, if he were to satisfy it with something forbidden, would it not be a sin on his part? Similarly, if he satisfies it lawfully, he will be rewarded.” [Muslim]
The woman should beware that her work should not be at the expense of raising her children. It is quite dangerous that the Muslim woman leaves here children with non-Muslim kindergarten teachers who may instill corrupt and false ideas in their minds and hearts. The children may become emotionally attached to them and this may negatively affect them in the future. In fact, though she is seeking to earn the reward for benefiting fellow Muslims with her work or study, she may end up bearing a sin instead because of neglecting to observe another religious obligation. She should try hard to find a Muslim nanny for her child; otherwise, it is better that she quits her work or studies.
Allaah knows best.
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