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Balancing Between Parents and Personal Family

Question

Assalamu Alaikum,I’m the only son of my parents, who live 4 hours away and want me to move closer to them to be near family and their grandson. My wife and I have good jobs here, and this city is her hometown with her family and a strong Muslim community. Jobs are limited in their city, and I don’t feel comfortable living there. I’m torn between my duty to my parents and what’s best for my own family. I need advice.Jazakum Allahu khairan.

Answer

All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.

You are required to strive earnestly to be dutiful to your parents and do your best to please them. However, if your situation is as you described, that you feel safe and stable in your place of work and leaving it could harm you, then it is not considered disobedience to your parents if you do not agree to live with them in their town, as long as they are not harmed by your decision.

You would not be sinful in this case, especially if you keep in touch with them through available means and continue to fulfil your financial responsibilities towards them, if they are in need.

Finally, try to kindly and wisely explain your situation to them so that they will be pleased with your decision to stay.

Allah knows best.

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