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Fatwa CenterNeighbors' help to a family of a lazy husband
Question
There is a Muslim family in our neighborhood that consists of a husband, wife and three daughters. The wife continues to perform her duties as a wife and mother, but the husband has not worked in a number of years and simply refuses to get a job. This situation has lead the wife to begging from all of us to provide for her family. Her father is even paying her monthly expenses.
Although there have been many brothers who have gone to talk with the husband, nothing ever changes. In fact, now the wife is making all kinds of excuses for his 'lazy behavior'. As neighbors we are Fed-up with this family. Please advise as to what we should do or how this matter can be handle, without us becoming so bitter toward this 'lazy family'.
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
The scholars
agreed in a consensus that the husband is obliged to spend on his wife and his children who have not yet reached the age of puberty. The Prophet 
said: "It is enough a sin for a man to neglect those on whom he is obliged to spend." [Abu Daawood] Therefore, your neighbour is obliged to fear Allaah and endeavour according to his ability to get his daily bread and spend on his wife and children, and bear the responsibility that Allaah has entrusted him with. The people who know him or have a relationship with him are obliged to remind him of Allaah and of the rights of his family on him. He should also be reminded that it is not permissible for him to neglect spending on them and not earn his sustenance, as this way he will oblige them to depend on others and ask other people for help. So, if he does not want to endeavour to earn his bread and spend on his family, his wife has the right to ask for divorce if she wants to, but she should consider what is best for her.
As far as you and his neighbours are concerned, we are of the view that you should carry on helping this family, according to your ability, who is afflicted with this husband and Allaah will not waste the reward of the doers of good. So seek the reward from Allaah because if you cut off your help from them, this might lead to unpleasant consequences, like the daughters being forced to deviate and commit fornication, and the like. So remember the Saying of Allaah (which means): {Surely, Allaah wastes not the reward of the doers of good.}[Quran 9:120]. Also, remember the Advice of Allaah and that of His Prophet about the neighbour, especially if he is a Muslim, as in such a case he has two rights on you, the right of a neighbour and the right of a Muslim. The Prophet said: "O Abu Tharr! If you cook soup, put much water (i.e. to increase it) in it and [always] give to your neighbours." [Muslim] The Prophet further said: "The angel Jibreel impressed upon me the kind treatment towards the neighbour so much that I thought he would soon confer upon him the right of inheritance." [Al-Bukhari]
Another narration reads: "He who relieves a believer from one of the difficulties of this world, Allaah will relieve him from one of the hardships of the Day of Judgement; he who grants time for a debtor who has no money until it is easy for him to repay, Allaah will make things easy for him in this world and in the Hereafter; and he who conceals the faults and sins of another Muslim, Allaah will conceal his faults and sins in this world and in the Hereafter. Indeed Allaah will continue to support His Slave as long as the slave supports his brother." [Muslim] Therefore, lend them a helping hand, Allaah will support you; remove from them a difficulty, Allaah will remove difficulties from you on the Day of Judgement; and conceal their faults and sins, Allaah will conceal your faults and sins in this world and in the Hereafter.
Finally, do not try to cause this man to divorce his wife; whoever can give them a charity, should do so and Allaah will reward him; and whoever cannot help them, at least he should not harm them, and this will be considered as an act of charity for him.
This is our advice, and we ask Allaah to enable everybody to do whatever He likes and He is pleased with.
Allaah Knows best.
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