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Fatwa CenterHer cousin abused her sexually when she was young but now he is a good Muslim
Question
Assalam-u-Alaikum I would like to ask you a question. I was sexually abused by a cousin of mine when I was 10. He was a few years older. But then I had had enough and confronted him about it. The matter ended then and there. Its been almost 10 years since. And we have not been on talking terms. He asked me to forgive him. I said yes I have forgiven you, but it was not whole-heartedly. I have seen him grow more pious since then, He prays regularly, fasts etc.. A few days back he sent me an email stating that he is very sorry and seeks forgiveness from me. He is possibly going for Hajj. Should I forgive him? Are there any saheeh ahadith and verses from the Qur'an proving that if I forgive him, then there will be reward for me in that. On the whole he is indeed a very nice and loving gentleman and loved children very much. Also if he sends a marriage propsal, should I accept it. Please advice
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger. We ask Allaah to exalt his mention as well as that of his family and all his companions.
We have already issued Fatwa 84351 about the excellence of forgiving, therefore, if you forgive your cousin, then this is very good, and you will, no doubt, find a blessed and good consequence of this, Allaah willing.
If he asks your hand for marriage, you should accept him especially since you mentioned that he is now steadfast on the straight path.
It is confirmed that the Prophet 
said: "If a man whose religion and moral conduct are pleasing to you asks to marry your daughter, you should marry her off to him." [At-Tirmithi].
Finally, the two following matters should be mentioned:
1- You should avoid suspicious places where one might be subjected to affliction, and you should be keen on wearing Hijab and abiding by the requirements which will help you preserve your dignity and chastity.
2- A cousin is a marriageable person to you, therefore, you are not permitted to talk to him or be in seclusion with him unless the religious requirements are met.
Allaah Knows best.
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