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Fatwa CenterThere is no limit on dutifulness to parents
Question
Is there such a thing as spoiling your mother or parents too much? I volunteer to do most of the work around the house Alhamdulillah which is one of the main causes that has led to my mother's unhealthy state, but the only way she will do the housework is if I take it easy or stop all at once - which she won't like at the moment but afterwards she feels much better - basically, she needs a push for her own good. What's your advice, may Allah reward you, that I can apply in a situation like this?
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad, sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam, is His slave and Messenger.
It is not appropriate to use the term “spoiling” for the parents. Being kind and dutiful to them has no limit. No matter to what extent the children are dutiful and obedient to their parents, they can never give them what they deserve, especially the mother. The religion reserved three-quarters of dutifulness for her.
Al-Faakihi related in his book Akhbaar Makkah that ‘Aamir ibn Yahya said: “A man was carrying his mother on his back going around the Ka‘bah in Tawaaf (circumambulation) and he was saying: ‘I carry my mother as she carried me when I was small and she breastfed me, does a son compensate her (by doing this) for what she did?’ ‘Umar 
said to him: ‘No, not even for one pain of labor.’ Then ‘Umar said: ‘I wish that my mother had converted to Islam so that I would carry her like you are carrying your mother; it would be dearer to me than what the sun has risen or set over.’”
For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 87019 and 82254.
This work that you do for your parents is a great deed and Allaah will greatly reward you for it. Anyway, you may seek the help of one of your mother’s friends or a doctor whom she trusts to advise her about the importance of movement for her health.
Allaah Knows best.
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