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Fatwa CenterObedience to parents
Question
Explain the rights of parents in some detail, especially when we think that our opinion is better that theirs when they ask us to do some thing or forbid us from doing something.
Answer
Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds; and may His blessings and peace be upon our Prophet Muhammad and upon all his Family and Companions.
It is an obligation to obey the parents as long as they do not order us to disobey Allah, the Almighty. Allah Says (interpretation of meaning): {But if they (both) strive with you to make you join in worship with Me others that of which you have no knowledge, then obey them not, but behave with them in the world kindly,….}[31:15].
If there is a contradiction between the opinion of the sons and/or daughters and their parents in something that is not a disobedience, then the opinion of the parents comes first, by being kind to them and fulfilling their rights.
However, if the parents ask the sons and/or daughters to do something that will harm them, then they do not have to obey them. The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: “The obedience is in good deeds”. [Reported by Bukhari]
Obeying them in what will cause harm is not considered a good deed.
The Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi wa Sallam) said: “Do not harm yourselves and do not cause harm to other people”. [Reported by Ibn Majah]
The Fuqaha (Islamic jurists) said that it is not obligatory upon the son to obey his father when he orders him to get married with someone whom he doesn’t like, because that will cause much trouble/harm during his marital life.
The Fuqaha also stated that the son is not obliged to obey his father who orders him to divorce his wife.
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