I married a khan girl, I luv against her parents' wish, thru proper Islamic Channel. Later her parents probably accepted the marriage and started visiting us. Further they asked me to send my wife to her paternal house for some days,which I did. But a day before her return, she started to disrespect me on phone. And on day of her return because upset from her I drank a great amount of alcoholic drinks, which perhaps shooted my anger over her, I slapped her and pronounced "I Divorce You" thrice. She called her parents and took her away from me, the same day ensuring that nothing of hers, either gifted by my family be left back in my house. Next morning I called them up, but they didnt allow me to talk my wife, and under much stress I attempted to kill myself, but not succeeded. Please also note that my deceased father was Sunni and my mother belongs to Shia Sect. She didnt marry again and brought up we two brothers. My question is whether divorce really took place as being boasted by her family, or not. As by my family, whether my father's or mother's, the divorce didnt take place. I have gone thru Quran majid and Hadiths, but am bit confused. Please help me out, as I love my wife very much and have apologised to her for my anger, and also seek forgiveness from His Mighty Allah Ta'ala, for my sins regularly. Eagerly waiting for your reply.
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
First of all, you should repent to Allaah for consuming intoxicants and you should know that the Islamic law clarified the solutions for the problems which occur between the spouses. Hence, a Muslim should not solve a problem by falling into another problem which is exactly what you did. For more benefit on dealing with a disobedient wife, please refer to Fatwa 89480.
Your question included two matters:
1- Saying to your wife "you are divorced" if you mean by this that you will divorce her in the future, then she is not divorced but if you intended to issue a divorce, then divorce took place.
2- Saying the above statement while in the state of drunkenness. The scholars differed in opinion about the divorce uttered by a drunken person whether or not it takes place. The view we adopt here in Islamweb is that divorce does not take place if the drunken person reached a state whereby he is not aware about what he says. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 87585. However, the issues on which there is a difference of opinion should only be solved by a Muslim judge as both parties are obliged to abide by his ruling. Therefore, if there is a dispute between you and your wife and her family about this divorce, you should take the matter to an Islamic court.
We emphasize what we already mentioned beforehand that one should take it easy and be wise when dealing with problems which occur in marital life.
Furthermore, the following matters should be mentioned:
1- The gifts which your family donated to your wife became her property if she already possessed them [the gifts].
2- Committing suicide is a very grave sin, and it is absolutely forbidden for a Muslim to commit suicide. If he is encountered with afflictions and difficulties, he should fear Allaah and be patient. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 81819.
3- The consent of the guardian is a condition for the validity of the marriage contract according to the majority of the scholars and this is the view we adopt here in Islamweb. If the marriage contract took place without a guardian, then the marriage is void and it must be invalidated, however, if a Muslim judge rules that it is correct or that it is him who conducted it, then it is valid. For more benefit on the conditions of a correct marriage contract, please refer to Fatwa 83629.
Allaah Knows best.
You can search for fatwa through many choices