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Fatwa CenterHer husband wants her back and does not regret his abusive behaviour towards her
Question
I have a very very odd situation. my husband left me and 2 kids and went to another state in 2006. before he left his behavior totally changed with me he became very doubtful of me and many times he would try to scare me and make up things that never took place. one time he hit me for no reason and then became upset about it he would scare me to the point that we had to leave our apartment and move in with my mom after losing his job because he said some one was trying to break in and i have never seen this take place. he would try to find any excuses to just scare me and make me feel uncomfortable around him.he would lie and say worst things to me. once he left the webcam on for recording without me knowing so the camera recorded sounds like water runing from the faucet,zipping a bag so by hearing the zipper he would accuse me for bringing someone in the house and doubting me after that he took off and he said he never liked it in ny. after he left and went to another state he would call me and still continue to come up with very uncomfortable things that i stoped talkig to him . he just totally changed on me.and i dont know the reason. ever since i have never seen him from 2006 to the present then he send me divorce paper in 2010 and divorced me in egypt with out me being in the country.i was in total chock i couldnt go through with it so i asked to reconcial because of the kids and my will being here alone with my sick mom i was scared .he took me back but during that time i found him talking about the same thing on the phone and would continue to talk to me about very uncomfortable topic and he said if i wanted to go back to him that i must forget get about anything in the past.he never apoligised or repented with anything that he did he just wants me to come and forget about anything that happened. I didnt have any intimate relation with him since 2006 even after iddah in 2010 because he still remains to be the same person i left in 2006.so where do i stand
Answer
All perfect praise be to Allaah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad 
is His slave and Messenger.
In principle, a Muslim is innocent and it is not permissible to accuse him of something bad without evidence; this matter is even more confirmed between spouses. Allaah Says (what means): {O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin.}[Quran 49:12]
Therefore, if what you mentioned is confirmed that your husband suspects you, then he is wrong, and the same thing applies in regard to frightening you; all this is evil and is not among having good marital relationship with his wife as he has been ordered by Allaah. For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 86618 and 88304.
Besides, it is not permissible for a husband to be absent from his wife for more than six months except with her consent, and if he absents himself from her for more than six months without a sound excuse, then this is a clear act of injustice. In addition to this, he is obligated to spend on her, and his children also have a great right on him. So, if he is also negligent about them, then he is unjust to them as well. ‘Abdullaah Ibn ‘Umar 
narrated that the Prophet said: “It is enough a sin for a person not to provide means of sustenance to those whom he is responsible to support.” [Ahmad and Abu Daawood] For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 92004 and 84073.
On the other hand, if your husband has taken you back a valid taking back of wife after divorce (i.e. during your waiting period form a revocable divorce), then you are now his wife. For more benefit, please refer to Fatwa 147013.
Finally, if his behavior with you did not change and is still the same, then it is more appropriate to ask him to divorce you. If he agrees and divorces you, then this is what is required, otherwise you may take your case to an Islamic Center or to an Islamic court in your country so that it will oblige him to divorce you or to grant you Khul’.
Allaah Knows best.
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